The New York Times published this first person account of the Iraq War. Ahmad Fadam is an Iraqi employee of The New York Times.
Since the invasion, I haven’t left Iraq for more than a month.
So I can say that I have seen it all. And I can still remember the day when the American troops reached Baghdad. I remember it just like if it was yesterday.
I’m 42, from an educated family. I myself have a Ph.D. in art. I am a sculptor. During all my life, I and my family didn’t have anything to do with the government. We knew that there is a thin red line between us and the government; if we don’t cross it or get near it, then we are fine.
I live now in the family home in western Baghdad. I have three brothers; two live with me and the third lives in Saidiya, in southwest Baghdad.
It used to take me no more than 10 minutes to get to Saidiya, it is not that far. When the war started, we figured that if the American troops reached Baghdad, it was going to be from the southwest, from Saidiya, along the airport road.
I advised my brother that he should send his family to my neighborhood in case something happened. He did, but he stayed behind. He said that he wanted to see what would happen, and if he could, he wanted to take part in defending Baghdad against the invaders.
This is how most people were thinking back then; about their city, and their country. But others thought that they shouldn’t fight, because they hate Saddam and thought that if they fight, then they will be defending him. Some said that it is a fight between Saddam and Bush and we don’t want to be part of it
After three days, I started to get worried about my brother. There was no electricity, no phones and of course no mobiles. I didn’t know what to do.
So I decided to go to Saidiya.
His wife and children insisted on coming with me to look for their father. My wife and my younger brother said they must come too.
So now, we were two men, two women and two young children in the car, and that is how the journey started.
On the way to Saidiya we drove through a suburb called Yarmuq. There I saw a pickup truck, run over by a tank. I managed to tell the color of the truck — white — but there was nothing else to tell. It was crushed like a tin can. I don’t know if there was anyone inside it. It was terrifying because it was the first time for us to see such a thing. And it meant a battle had happened here.
Who crushed the truck? The Iraqis? Or maybe the Americans? Everyone in the car was surprised of what they saw. It was shocking. And I thought, Oh my God, this means that the Americans are already in Baghdad, so I started driving carefully.
In another neighborhood called Qadisiya, I saw Iraqi armored personnel carriers, brand new, just left there in the street. I didn’t know what happened to the soldiers — were they all dead, or had they just fled?
When I reached the Jadriya Bridge to Saidiya, there was a big surprise waiting: an American tank, an Ibrahim [Abrams].
It was the first time for me to see an American tank. I stopped, and started thinking fast. What if the gunner decided to aim at me?? With women and children in the car, I must not do anything wrong that might excite him. I should back up slowly and get the hell out of here.
The women, and as usual, were trying to give me instructions of what to do. “Oh Ahmad, be careful, he may see us, don’t go forward, turn around…” and they kept talking and shouting.
But I wasn’t listening.
A little later, I saw people waving for me to slow down. I asked them what was going on. They told me that minutes ago, an American tank fired a shell against a civilian car and killed a couple who were in it. I had to change my destination.
The women were freaked out and so was I. But I had to calm them down in order to think of what to do. It was just like seeing an action movie, or to be more accurate, living it.
I was driving but without thinking, I was in shock. A few minutes later, I passed the same place where I saw the Iraqi armored carriers but this time they were burned. What is happening???
I decided then to take another route to get to my brother, so I drove to another neighborhood, Amil. It is also to the west. Everything was calm there, and I managed to reach Saidiya. There was another horrible scene waiting for us.
I started seeing Iraqi Army trucks burned, and bodies lying in the streets. Weapons were everywhere, blood, human flesh… It was a nightmare.
The women started to cry and so did the kids, and I was just driving and driving without saying a word.
We finally got to my brother’s house and he was there He started describing to me how everyone was shocked seeing the American tanks coming into Baghdad, and how the tanks started firing at anything that moved in front in them, no matter what it was, even if it was a car with civilians in it.
It was a horrible day for everyone. Nobody has seen such firepower before. He told me about this Iraqi soldier who jumped in front of the American tank trying to aim his R.P.G. at it, but he was killed when the tank fired a cannon shell at him.
My brother was telling me how he started collecting the flesh of that soldier, and cried: “It was total madness — Ahmad, in a matter of minutes, everything was burned and everyone was dead. I still cannot believe what happened.”
When I first saw that crushed pickup truck, in a way I was happy. I was happy that the Americans are finally here and they are going to save us from Saddam, but after a few hours, and after all the death I saw, I started wondering whether saving us from Saddam was a good idea, because we weren’t expecting such a thing, and I know that using violence in Iraq does not generate anything else but more violence.
It has been five years since that day and the violence is still on. And I don’t know if it ever will stop.
It is worth noting that this is coming from a well-off Iraqi who has not lost close family. Imagine the perspective on the war for the millions of Iraqi's who lost someone they loved as a result of the violence?
In general, the US is very detached from the horros of the war. These first-person accounts really help put the horrors of the war into perspective.
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